Chapter Two

Luckily for Connor’s stupid plan, the birth certificate didn’t list any father. Unluckily for literally everyone else in this situation, it kind of cemented the fact that this kid’s parents fucking abandoned her in the rain in a park that’s been out of use for years. If Evan had any room for anger beside his debilitating fear and anxiety, he would be furious.

“Her name’s Willow.” He said, though he didn’t need to. “Is your name Willow?”

He looked down at the girl, staring at him from her place against Connor’s shoulder. She’s too calm about all of this. It’s good for them of course, having a fighting, crying toddler would definitely look bad for them, but in general, she really should be more bothered about being basically kidnapped. What was her life like before now? Who took care of her? Was she just used to being passed on to strangers? The idea of it scared him and he had no experience with children.

She nodded, though. That has to mean something good, right? She knows her name at least.

“Okay, Willow, we’re gonna get you help,” Connor said, jostling her a bit to get her attention. “To do that, I need you to pretend I’m your dad, okay?”

Willow just looked at him, silently.

“I’m gonna take that as a yes, lets get inside.”

Connor looked at him over her head, like he was waiting for an okay. Evan nodded, and they walked inside.

They got surprisingly few weird looks for two teenage boys with a toddler. Maybe they look like babysitters or older brothers. Maybe Connor and Willow’s resemblance to each other was enough. Either way, it was a small balm to his nerves that most of the people around them were too busy with their own emergencies to care about theirs.

They’re only a few steps into the waiting area when his mom comes speed walking towards them, worriedly looking them over for blood or vomit or any obvious injuries. Evan can tell the moment she spies Willow, because her lips purse the way they do when she’s trying really really hard not to make a big deal out of something.

“Honey, are you alright?” She asked as soon as they were in man handling distance, holding Evan’s face and looking him over, then doing the same to Connor and Willow.

“We’re fine, mom, just-”

“My daughter.” Connor spoke up, getting all of his mom’s attention on him. “Her mom lost custody of her and left her with me unexpectedly. She was out in the rain for a while because my ex didn’t know I would be getting home late today, so I wanted to make sure she was okay.”

“Your… daughter.” His mom nodded, looking between the two of them and apparently coming to the same conclusion. “Alright. If you’ll bring her with me, I’ll get her on a bed so we can take a look at her.”

as she turned to lead them away, she gave Evan a look like she would be demanding an explanation sooner rather than later.

“can you tell me anything about your daughter…” She looked back at them expectantly.

“Connor. Connor Murphy.” He frowned, “Her name is Willow, she’s one and a half. I don’t know much about her allergies or anything if that’s what you mean. Me and her mother haven’t been close in a long time. I didn’t even know she existed before today.”

“That’s awful,” His mom clucked, reaching out to hold Willow and set her down on a bed. She smiled then, leaning down to give all her attention to the kid. “Hi Willow, I’m Heidi. I’m gonna help your dad make sure you’re feeling okay, alright?”

She waited a second until Willow nodded, still quiet.

“Awesome! Can you tell me how you feel?” She asked, “Are you hot or cold? Does anything hurt?”

Willow stayed silent, but moved her head around, looking between his mom and Connor. He stepped up, putting a hand on her forehead and cheek.

“She feels like she has a fever,” Connor said, quietly, “She hasn’t really talked since I got her. Mostly just cried.”

“She’s probably going through a lot right now,” Heidi nodded, turning around to grab a thermometer, “Some kids clam up when they’re scared or stressed out. I can’t imagine she’s very comfortable in a strange environment and wet clothes.”

Evan steps away from the two of them, looking anywhere but at his mom and Connor Murphy. He felt like he was watching something he wasn’t supposed to, like when he was a little kid hanging around the hospital after school and spying in on people’s conversations. Even knowing it was fake, that he was lying to his mother and that he was an integral part of this plot, he felt like an outsider looking in.

He turns away, asks after some of the nurses he recognizes, and tries not to be too obvious when he looks over his shoulder. His mom checked Willow’s pulse. Connor picked her up when she started crying. His mom checks her over for injuries. Connor brought out her documents. His mom ranted about her vaccine records. Willow fell asleep on Connor’s shoulder. His mom took her in her arms.

They’re talking quietly, too quietly to be heard over the noise of a hospital, but he knows that look on his mom’s face. The way she looks at him when he has a panic attack or gets a call from his dad. Connor looks...different. Evan is glad he stepped away.

He goes to grab an apple juice from the vending machine down the hall. It gives him an excuse to step further away and let the full blown panic attack he’s been holding back rush to the front of his mind. This whole day has been an exercise in not laying on the floor and waiting to rot. He can’t even think back to this morning without feeling like he’s going to vomit. Or cry. He’s already crying, god he’s pathetic.

Evan tries to lean on the vending machine with his good arm, but ends up crumpled beside it, legs giving out under him. He can barely breath and is hyperaware of the other people in the hallway. If he could think rationally, he might take comfort in the fact that people freaking out in a hospital isn’t exactly uncommon, most people know to mind their own business given the setting, but he just couldn’t let it go. The feeling of eyes on his back was crushing. He’s crying over nothing. This is a hospital, people have real problems to deal with and none of them were having panic attacks by the juice machine. He’s not just pathetic, he’s mocking everyone here with actual shit going on. He can’t do anything. He’s a fucking baby, just like his dad said-

“Are you good?”

His throats closed so tight he can’t even swallow. Evan doesn’t want to look up, to see the look on Connor’s face when he realized exactly how pathetic he is. He looks down at his hands, shaking and wet with tears from desperately wiping at his face. His whole body is trembling and he can’t focus on anything in front of him.

“Hansen, fucking answer me.”

“S-sorry.”

He answered on pure instinct, not even meaning to open his mouth. He doesn’t want to look up. He doesn’t want to, but he can see Connor’s hand coming towards him out of the corner of his eye.

He drags him up off his knees, way more easily than he should probably be able to. Either Evan is a lot smaller than he thought he was or Connor is surprisingly strong. The thought stops his mind from racing long enough that he doesn’t fight when Connor reaches for his hand, taking out the cash he’d been gripping onto for dear life, soft with sweat and tears.

“What were you trying to buy?” He asks, quiet enough that only Evan can hear, but not exactly gentle.

“A-apple juice. For, uh, Willow.”

Connor looked away from him, standing up to actually use the vending machine, acting like Evan wasn’t even there. He honestly didn’t think he’d ever been so grateful to be ignored. Connor didn’t even mentioning when he flinched at the apple juice falling into the bottom of the machine, moving around him to grab it.

“Clean up, man, your mom’s asking for you.” Connor said, knocking into his shoulder and walked away.

He stays there by the vending machine for another few minutes, breathing and staring down at the ground until he can think about everything that’s happened that day without wincing. It takes a few minutes before he’s able to make his way back towards his mom.

Even knowing she’s asking for him, Evan stops a bit away to watch them again.

“-She might have a runny nose for a few hours, and a slight fever, but she’ll be fine,” His mom is smiling up at Connor, holding Willow in her arms as they talk. Willow is still quiet, still wrapped up in Connor’s jacket, staring at the world over his moms shoulders and sniffling every so often, little fingers clutching his mom’s scrubs.

The sight is almost too adorable for him to mind Connor also being in the picture. This might be the most relaxed he’s seen his mom in a long time, even including when she was asleep. She really likes kids.

“So, I should be okay to take her home?” Connor asks, fingers twitching. If Evan didn’t know better, he’d think Connor was anxious to get Willow back.

“Well, yes, you can.” His mom smiles, but doesn’t hand Willow over. “But I’d like to talk to you for a second, if you don’t mind.”

His mom sits Willow down and motions for him to step aside with her, talking quietly enough that Evan thinks he’s not supposed to hear what they’re saying, but he still does. He tries to distract himself, but he can’t help it.

“Are you alright taking care of a child?” His mom asks, not unkindly, putting a hand on Connor’s arm. “It’s your choice, of course, but do you have somewhere for her at home, resources for supplies, a support network? I know how hard it is to raise a kid on your own.”

“I’ve got money, and a few friends to help out,” Connor nods, and Evan feels like that’s only a half truth. “I don’t care much about school, so I’m free to look after her during the day. I really want this to work out, mam.”

“I can see that,” She smiles, “You’re so careful with her, I can tell you’re doing your best. Hopefully your parents could help you with taking care of her during the day, though? I wouldn’t want you missing out on your education.”

“Oh. My parents…” Evan can hear the grimace in his voice. “They’d kick me out if I brought a kid home, honestly. My dad’s never really liked me or the stuff I get up to, this would probably be a step too far.”

Connor shrugs like he’s completely unaffected by the words, but his hands are balled into fists at his sides. So, not necessarily a lie. Evan didn’t want to pry into Connor’s life but, it’s not unbelievable. He knows Connor’s not be the best behaved kid, but bringing a baby home after some secret whirlwind romance seems like a particularly bad idea.

“Well…” His mom hummed, looking between Connor and Evan for a long while. When she seemed to pull together an idea, she continued, slowly. “I don’t think it’s a good idea to keep this from your parents. They need to know they have such a beautiful granddaughter. But you also need a plan if you’re going to keep her. Why don’t you stay at our place for the night? Get together some supplies, get a feel for taking care of her, and make a plan. Does that sound alright?”

Evan only barely stopped himself from letting out an embarrassing little squeak. He didn’t want Connor Murphy in his house! He’d only just staved off one panic attack, what would he do if Connor decided to continue their little conversation from the park? Of if he trashed the place? Or made fun of his state park posters!?

“I don’t wanna- I mean,” Connor stammered for a second, “I don’t wanna bother you. I’m not the easiest kid to deal with.”

“You wouldn’t be any trouble at all,” his mom smiled, “We have plenty of space for a couple guests and at least for tonight, there’s pizza money.”

Connor was quiet for a long moment, looking between Willow and his mom, a crease forming between his brows the longer he thought. Finally, his shoulders dropped and he nodded. “Alright. At least for tonight, while I figure everything out. I’m gonna go… text my sister.”

And Connor walked away, leaving his mom to pet Willow’s hair and tell her little nothings in the sweet voice she saves for children under ten and Evan when he’s not doing so well. Willows eyes followed Connor out and stayed on the door he’d gone through for a long time. If he ignored the events that got them there, the scene would be a sweet one. It still was with context, just also stressful. He stepped up into his mom’s line of sight, breaking up the scene with his presence, a sentiment that didn’t comfort him in the least.

“Uh, hey mom.” He smiled, thought it felt more like a grimace. He caught her eyes flick down to his cast and the bleeding block letters across it.

“Evan, there you are!” She stood and came towards him and despite knowing she never would, he was afraid for a moment she was going to hit him.

Instead, obviously, his mom wrapped her arms around him, pressing her nose into his hair and a kiss to his forehead. He doesn’t know what to do, except hug her back. For a small moment, it felt like his panic attack just a minute ago didn’t happen and he was a kid again- curling into his moms embrace after school. Back when the constant noise and movement of the hospital made him feel so small.

“It was good of you to call me,” She told him, pulling away to look at his face. “And I’m always happy to meet a friend of yours.”

“Oh. Uh, it was just… the right thing to do,” He mumbled, shrugging so his mom wouldn’t see just how much of him and Connor’s apparent friendship was a lie.

“I thought Jared was supposed to take you home today,” She said, and it wasn’t a question, but it felt like one.

“He, uh, was busy after school,” Evan cringed at his own flaccid attempt at an excuse, “That’s why I asked Connor for a ride…”

He trailed off, looking at his mom to see if she’d take the explanation or dig deeper. She frowned, lips pursing, but didn’t push.

“Well, I’m glad you had someone there to help.” She looked over his shoulder and Evan could tell that Connor was making his way back over to them. “Are you alright with all of this, honey? I know it’s pretty sudden.”

“Oh, yeah, of course,” He laughed awkwardly, then for real when his mom chuckled at his very clear lie. “I mean, I’m fine, really. It’s not like he has anywhere else to go, right?”

His mom hugged him again, tighter than before. “You’re a good kid, Evan.”

*

When Evan climbed back into Connor’s car, he realized the car smelled like smoke. Whether it was like that before and he was too busy freaking out to notice or if Connor had used his short walk to smoke in his car where Willow couldn’t see him. He figured it wasn’t something for him to bring up, but he did wonder anxiously if it was bad enough to effect Willow.

“Do you need, like, directions to my house?” He asked hesitantly while Connor finished buckling Willow back into her seat. Instead of answering, Connor just looked at him for a second, then back down at her.

He was saying something Evan couldn’t hear, a mumbled litany that held Willows attention the whole time he was finagling her into her seat and then after, when he just hung in the door with her until whatever he was saying was done. Another thing Evan figured he shouldn’t mention. It had stopped raining at least.

When they were on the road again, Evan tried to ask again, but Connor just looked at him. The look itself would have been enough to shut Evan up, but after seeing Connor drive in the rain, seeing him look away from the road even for a second made his heart race. He needed a fucking nap. So he gave up trying, just let Connor drive him wherever he wanted. It’s not like the day could get any worse. The sun is already starting to set.

He’s tired enough that not even the general anxiety of being in a moving car can keep him up and at attention. He tries, sure, but the low hum of the tires on asphalt drowns out his thoughts. His head slowly droops until he’s leaning against the window and his eyes are closing without his say so.